Chapter 69

Sam stared out at the glass smooth blue of the sea and breathed deeply.  The morning had dawned bright and clear with a smattering of clouds and she had been eager to get out into it. With a long sigh, she closed her eyes and focused on the breeze that blew her hair across her face. The season was changing. Despite the brightness of the sun, there was a cool crispness to the air and that smell that made you think of corn and harvest.

Drawing in another deep breath, she opened her eyes. For the first time in weeks, she felt safe and at peace. The past month memories had poured into her consciousness with an almost overwhelming rate. Every day some small item seemed to form in her mind and by the end of the day she had the whole memory. The night Reece had told her what happened had been horrible. She relived the attack and death of her cousin over and over in her dreams that night. John had sat by her bed all night, calming her when she woke screaming.

The nightmares stopped after a few nights and now it was as if she were just recalling things. Things that were not frightening or horrible.

She turned and headed back to the house. On the horizon the mist swirled and boiled, shapes shifting on some breeze that followed no laws. Last night she knew that the barrier would soon open and what that would mean. For the next 24 hours, it was possible someone might come through...or leave. If the barrier let them.

The house was quiet except for sounds from the kitchen. The delicious scents of breakfast preparations drifted along the hallway. Sam went quietly to the door at the back of the hall. She took the key from the hook behind the painting and unlocked it, opening it on well-oiled hinges. The stairs were dark but she could see at the bottom there was a light. From the side table, she lighted a lantern and picked it up, holding it high as she carefully descended the stairs. At the bottom, she headed to the caves that would lead her to the beach.

The last year had been such a long journey. The one she now made was nothing in comparison but she knew it might be the most difficult part thus far. She could not stop the smuggling. Despite the legal aspects of it, after her time in the Outland, it was impossible not to realize that the reality was far from ethical. If the Council would simply help the residents with survival…. She shook her head. There was no point in wrestling that devil. She had no sway with the Council. No. The only thing she and John could do was look the other way. The smuggling was the knife edge of survival to the people forced to live in the Outland. They deserved at least that much.

 She felt the breeze long before she reached the beach. As she entered the cavern where Alaina had died, she hesitated. A deep sadness welled up in her chest. She’d wanted to like her cousin and she still couldn’t understand why she’d hated her so much. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I don’t understand what happened but I’m sorry.” She swiped the tears from her cheek and moved through the curtain into the lake filled cave and from there through the opening onto the enclosed beach.

The boats, there were three of them, lay a short distance from the shore and men were moving between them, loading supplies. John stood talking to Reece. They laughed together about something and then Reece saw her. She took a deep breath and her mouth stretched into a tight smile. She had to try.

 He moved toward her. “I hoped you’d come.”

She turned the smile up to him. “I...I realized last night that you’d probably leave today rather than wait for nightfall.”

He twisted a piece of string in his hands. “Yes, we’ve waited long enough. I’m hoping to bring back some medicines this trip. Lucian has given me a list of things he feels are crucial.”

She nodded but didn’t know what to say.

“I’ll be back, Sam.”

Again she nodded.

“I … don’t know when.”

A bitter laugh now. “No, you don’t. In fact, you don’t even know if.”

“Sam.” His face twisted, as if in pain and his eyes pleaded with her. “Please.”

She shook her head and swallowed the knot that was forming in her throat. “Don’t.”

“I want you to understand.”

“I do.”

He dropped the string he’d twisted into a large knot. “Do you? I wish you did.” Someone shouted at him and he looked back at the boats.

She waited, thinking he had already left her. “You’re an adventure. You live for it.”

He turned back to her and in his face was an excitement and an eagerness. “You may be right.” With both hands, he reached out and cupped her face. He leaned down and kissed her. “Sam, come with me,” he said, his lips brushing lightly against hers. “You can join my adventure. I'll take care of you."

Tears blurred her vision and spilled over. A sob made her breath catch and she clutched his wrist. “I can't! Don't you understand? This is my home. I belong here. I don't belong out there.” Pausing to look out at the shimmering mist. It was thinning. “And neither do you.” she whispered.

“I have a job to do. Our. . . my people need this.”

“Someone else can do it. Reece, please?”

“No,” he whispered. “They can’t.”

The wind whipped around them, blowing her hair into her face, blinding her. Gently, he brushed it back and smiled, his eyes studying her face as if committing it to memory. With his thumb, he traced her lips, her brows and then her nose. He gave a small laugh. “I love your nose.”

The ache spread throughout her body. Surely it was not possible to hurt this much and live. “I can't go, Reece. My family is here.”

“I understand. You know I can't promise I'll be able to get back.”

Unable to speak, she nodded.

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her again, this time with an urgency they both understood. When he spoke it was so low that she could barely hear. “I love you.” Then, he turned and ran into the water, hopping over the gunwale and into the boat. His crew shoved off and began rowing away, just as they had in her dream.

She started toward the water, at first she walked then she ran. Waves swirled around her ankles, drawing her as she watched the boat move out of the cove and into the open water. Certain that her chest would explode if she didn't speak, she yelled across the water. “REECE!” She began to wade out, crying so hard she could barely see and gasping for breath.

“REECE!” He looked back.  “Please.”

The mist began to shift and roil as if it were being stirred. It seemed to stretch and she could see it begin to tear apart in places. Through the tears, she saw blue skies and sunlight. No one that she knew had ever seen it happen. She felt as if she were smothering. The water was up to her waist now. In minutes she'd have to swim. But she'd never reach them in time. Already they were near the portal that seemed to open in their path. She couldn't stop it.

“NO! NO!” She pounded the water with her fist and tried to walk faster.

For only seconds, the mist parted and then, the Whitehall slipped into it and disappeared from her view. Her last view of Reece was as he stood looking back at her as the mist closed around him.

The water rose suddenly about her and she stumbled in over her head. For a moment it was tempting to do nothing but sink down and let the waves carry her out, perhaps through the mist. Arms caught her and began to pull her to back toward the beach and safety. She was coughing and choking, spewing seawater out of her mouth, shoving her drenched hair out of her face.

“Let me go, John!” She wrenched against his body but he held her fast. Sobs tore at her throat. “I have to go with him. Please.”

“Samantha! Stop.” John pulled her arms against her body and held her tightly. “Just stop.”

Even as she pleaded with him she watched as the mist twisted and curled back on itself, blue sky and sunlight disappeared and the opening closed. The fight left her and she crumpled against John and he lifted her and carried onto the beach. She collapsed onto the sand.

The turmoil of the mist calmed, clouds blew in from the headland, and the day seemed to dim. She swiped tears from her face with her sleeve. John stared down at her, breathing hard.

“He’ll be back, Sam. You know he will.”

She shook her head. “No one can promise that. It could be years. I could be dead.”

“Why didn’t you go with him?”

She frowned and looked at him. “My life is here. What would I do out there? And how do I know if it is a place I want to live?”

He retrieved his shoes and jacket from the sand and held out a hand to her. “You won’t know unless you go see.”

With a long sigh, she took his hand and he pulled her to her feet. As they started back toward the cave she threw one last, aching look behind her. The mist was a dark cloud on the water.